Why Josh Can't Be Left Alone

The first step of growth is often admitting your weakness, recognizing the effect it has on your daily life, and looking to overcome the weakness by using compensating strengths.

One of my fears in life is failure. I know, pretty typical. But it holds me back. It's not that I'm under some ridiculous amount of pressure to be Superman. Nobody has set up high expectations for me. Except myself, of course. I can get past letting others down, but letting myself down...I have to look at myself in the mirror every day.

One of the effects of this fear is that I don't set any solid goals or expectations for my life. Either short or long term, I don't have any concrete plans that I'm aiming for. Obviously, this is so that no matter what I end up accomplishing, it will not fall short of some pre-determined destination.

I compensate by having very high ideals. While not concrete, they do serve as a strong motivator towards accomplishing more.

Recently, I was rejected in my application to the University of Chicago Business School. While this would've helped lead me along my ideal path, it was not a goal in and of itself. By making this mental distinction, the rejection just became a force that will push me along another path towards my ideal. Rejection did not serve as a depressing reminder of my failure to be anywhere.

My attitude may come across as "unfocused" to some, but it sure seems like a healthier way of dealing with things beyond your own control.