Sunday, June 17, 2007
Growing Up
So now I'm a landowner. And rather then maintain an empty box, I've furnished it. OK, with other people's garbage, but it's my treasure. It's got everything a guy could need. Well, not really, unless you don't need toilet paper. But it wasn't easy decorating the place, and not just because I have very limited design sense. Emotionally, it was an exhausting committment, and not just because I hate shopping.
At first, I thought I was just upset about the prospect of spending money. I do have an innate thrifty side, so I originally suspected that I was just unwilling to part with my hard earned cash. But seeing as I had hundreds of dollars in gift certificates from previous birthdays and Chanukah's that I had never spent (I never needed anything), I really didn't have much of an excuse.
But it was a different investment that I realized I was avoiding. Until this point, pretty much everything I've ever bought was purchased with the same mindset - that I should get tons of use out of this item, until it wears out. That is a great investment.
But the new items I was buying for my apartment were different. I only stood to lose on this investment. See, partially based on my own poor taste as well as based on differences between guys and girls, anything I would buy when I'm single would have little chance of surviving through to married life. That would make this quite the disposable investment.
But on the other hand, marriage isn't imminent. Maybe I'll own these items in my bachelor pad for years to come. Maybe I'll even wear them out. Good investment? Maybe I'm more troubled by the thought that I've just made a safe investment in a prolonged bachelorhood.
At first, I thought I was just upset about the prospect of spending money. I do have an innate thrifty side, so I originally suspected that I was just unwilling to part with my hard earned cash. But seeing as I had hundreds of dollars in gift certificates from previous birthdays and Chanukah's that I had never spent (I never needed anything), I really didn't have much of an excuse.
But it was a different investment that I realized I was avoiding. Until this point, pretty much everything I've ever bought was purchased with the same mindset - that I should get tons of use out of this item, until it wears out. That is a great investment.
But the new items I was buying for my apartment were different. I only stood to lose on this investment. See, partially based on my own poor taste as well as based on differences between guys and girls, anything I would buy when I'm single would have little chance of surviving through to married life. That would make this quite the disposable investment.
But on the other hand, marriage isn't imminent. Maybe I'll own these items in my bachelor pad for years to come. Maybe I'll even wear them out. Good investment? Maybe I'm more troubled by the thought that I've just made a safe investment in a prolonged bachelorhood.
# posted by Josh : Sunday, June 17, 2007
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If you pick neutral colors, the items will likely survive your future wife's strong hand of doom sweeping all things bachelor away.
-Shosh
-Shosh
# posted by 
: June 17, 2007 1:24 PM
: June 17, 2007 1:24 PM
Don't hold back b/c of a hypothetical marriage. You are still living your life right now even if you aren't married. Kudos for buying and not just renting. Enjoy the new home.
Sho - I don't know what a neutral color is! All I can hope is that I don't make a circus of my place in an effort to save a few bucks.
J - It's important to live with your life, and not just look forward to the future. But at the same time, I'm a big believer in keeping your eyes on the horizon and not your feet. You want to make sure your heading on a path to your eventual goal, so that means not doing things differently now than you would eventually want them. Obviously, we can always change ourselves if we decide we've veered, but it wouldn't make sense for somebody to go to Medical School if they had no intention of being a doctor. Similarly, it wouldn't make sense to spend hundreds or thousands of dollars setting up a home that shouldn't last too long. Buying is an investment, but mis-decorating is a fashion tragedy!
J - It's important to live with your life, and not just look forward to the future. But at the same time, I'm a big believer in keeping your eyes on the horizon and not your feet. You want to make sure your heading on a path to your eventual goal, so that means not doing things differently now than you would eventually want them. Obviously, we can always change ourselves if we decide we've veered, but it wouldn't make sense for somebody to go to Medical School if they had no intention of being a doctor. Similarly, it wouldn't make sense to spend hundreds or thousands of dollars setting up a home that shouldn't last too long. Buying is an investment, but mis-decorating is a fashion tragedy!
Must not have been a co-op board involved. I would have had to leak some infamous videos of you so they'd get to see the man behind the payos.
Everyone in this category (single home owner) goes through the same dilemma. Think of it this way - if it looks good, then when it comes time to sell you may get a better price. Don't go overboard, but you have to live in the present. Congrats on the apartment and may you use it in good health.
MH
MH
Basic quality pieces-- especially in neutral colors-- will survive after you find your basheret. Besides, maybe she'll appreciate not having to throw everything out and start over the way she would if your house were filled with junk.
sus - Can you imagine how many board members I had to sleep with to get in the building...good thing they didn't check YouTube.
MH - I agree that my problem isn't unique (actually, almost none of what I write about is unique. That would make for quite a boring blog.) Generally, yeah, I evaluate all purchases based on their likely return. A used couch, probably not bad. But $10 silverware from Target? That'll be garbage...just a question of when...
Ahuvs - Truthfully, that is the basic Hashkafa I have in any purchases (ahide from the cost/investment issue above). It should be stylish, but not faddish, and should essentially look good for its entire life. While my taste might not be terrible, I'm not very good at putting the whole package together - say silverware with dishes. Or clock with couch. But I'm more concerned about hunkering down for singlehood as a phase of life rather than a transition.
MH - I agree that my problem isn't unique (actually, almost none of what I write about is unique. That would make for quite a boring blog.) Generally, yeah, I evaluate all purchases based on their likely return. A used couch, probably not bad. But $10 silverware from Target? That'll be garbage...just a question of when...
Ahuvs - Truthfully, that is the basic Hashkafa I have in any purchases (ahide from the cost/investment issue above). It should be stylish, but not faddish, and should essentially look good for its entire life. While my taste might not be terrible, I'm not very good at putting the whole package together - say silverware with dishes. Or clock with couch. But I'm more concerned about hunkering down for singlehood as a phase of life rather than a transition.
Happy to see that you like this neck of the woods enuf to buy..Dont lose hope you never know.
When its the rt one, it comes bkeref ayin..
When its the rt one, it comes bkeref ayin..
Thanks SG, I never know where she'll come from. And I don't know if I love it here, but I do think it's a great investment!
Good to see you writing again. And congratulations on your purchase.
I'd say that an attractive and well kept bachelor pad should only enhance your standing amongst the womenfolk, speeding up the day of yoru marriage.
I'd say that an attractive and well kept bachelor pad should only enhance your standing amongst the womenfolk, speeding up the day of yoru marriage.
TK - hehe, that is actually my clothing hashkafa! I think being parve is quite important.
T - Thanks - I'm going to try and not be a stranger. The only challenge with the pad is not taking too much opportunity to sow my wild oats...
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T - Thanks - I'm going to try and not be a stranger. The only challenge with the pad is not taking too much opportunity to sow my wild oats...
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